A BIT OF HUMOUR

A second grader came home from school and said to her mother,

"Mom, guess what? We learned how to make babies today."

The mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.

"That's interesting," she said, "How do you make babies?"

"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."


What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up this morning?

He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

And why did that upset you?

My name is Susan.


Teacher: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".

Student: I is...

Teacher: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am..."

Student: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."


I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"

She said, "Somewhere I have never been!"

So I told her, "How about the kitchen?!"


Wife: Do you want dinner?

Husband: Sure, what are my choices?

Wife: Yes and no.


Husband: "Pack your bags, honey. I just won the lottery."

Wife: "That's wonderful! Should I pack for warm weather or cold?"

Husband: "I don't care, as long as you're out of the house by noon."

"All De Same"

A man was rushing his wife, who was pregnant with twins, to the hospital. He was so nervous and disoriented, he pulled up to the emergency room and rear-ended an ambulance! Though a very minor bump, he actually passed out from the stress! Upon regaining consciousness, he saw his brother (a relentless world-class practical joker) sitting at his bed side.He asked his brother how his wife was and his brother replied, "Don't worry, everybody is fine and you have a son and a daughter.

But the hospital was in a real hurry to get the birth certificates filed and both you and your wife were unconscious so I named them for you."

The husband's heart jumped up into to his throat, thinking, "Oh no, what has he done now?" He nervously asked his brother, "W-w-well, what did you name them?"

The brother replied, "I named the little girl Denise."

"Really?!? Oh! Well, that's a very pretty name!" the husband said, his relief showing as he sat up.

"And what did you name my son?"

"Denephew."

Compiled and presented by Öznur YILMAZ / PAKİSTAN